Growing Up

Well today marked a milestone in my journey as a mother...I did something that every Mother thinks about from the moment that their child is born, I Enrolled Maxwell in Kindergarten. It was such a bittersweet moment. I have thought about it form such a long time. "Where will he go? Will it be the right choice? Is he ready? Am I ready?" Well after much debate, many tours, and a few assessments, the answers are clear. Maxwell will be attending Southwest Elementary School. It is a good fit for him at this time in his life. I prayed about it a lot, and found peace when I entered the building. He is ready. He can read ( basic words and sounds), he can write (except 2's and 5's he gets backwards), he can count ( at least to 100), and he LOVES to learn. Am I ready? That still remains to be answered. I am so thankful to live in a country where my child has the opportunity and PRIVILEGE to attend school. There are many countries where this is not available to children. He has a wonderfully supportive family and extended family that value education and want the best for him. I still find it difficult to let him Grow up. I want him to grow, to learn, to become a productive member of society and to be happy. But it is all going so fast. As a teacher, I never thought I would have this much difficulty sending my child off to school. A place that I enjoy going to everyday. But it is so different from this prospective. I know he will do well and be happy. He couldn't wait to go see it. As we walked down the halls he wanted to go into every room and see if that was his teacher. He even told Nanny all about his Big Boy 5 year old school over the phone tonight. As I listened to him with such excitement, and tears in my eyes, I knew that he was ready and as a mother, I know the right thing to do. Yes he will go to school this August, with a new book bag, lunchbox and a smile. And as his mommy, I will take him, hug and kiss him, and then walk out the door as I send him on this new journey in his life. But I will Smile the whole time. And as I turn away and walk to the car I will cry. Tears of joy, for getting this far ( with God's help) and pride in Maxwell's accomplishments. But also with tears of sorrow, knowing that time goes by so quickly and that my BABY is no longer a Baby, but a Big 5 year old Boy. None of these feelings change the fact that I will continue to be thankful for the opportunity to have him in my life and more time to watch him grow. He truly is a blessing and I will continue to trust in God to watch after him in this new journey and to guide me in making the right choices for him. I just hope and pray that I don't hold on to tight or let go to soon.